


Aomine Daiki: Straightest Man Alive

by 3_idiots



Series: The -ests of Living [1]
Category: Kuroko no Basuke | Kuroko's Basketball
Genre: Aho wants to BE Kagami's shorts, Attempt at Humor, Baka don't mind, Baka left shame at home, Crack, I try to be funny, I try too hard, I want Kagami's shorts, IK!! WHO WOULDA GUESSED??, M/M, Oh look! Mutual wanting of the gay!, Pining!, Staring, Subtlety and Kagami are not synonyms, Where is the shame?, Yelling, ahaha but not a lot, btw the title is a lie, did I mention yelling?, some actual basketball!, that's always nice, the yelling is almost as important as Baka's sweet booty
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-21
Updated: 2017-05-21
Packaged: 2018-11-03 10:13:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,576
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10965147
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/3_idiots/pseuds/3_idiots
Summary: Kagami needed to get his gaydar checked because god dammit, he’d worn THE shorts. The BOOTY CALL shorts. The shorts he only wore when he was truly desperate for attention, the ones that only stopped at mid-thigh and hugged his ass like its life depended on it. He’d blamed the heat for his wardrobe choice while giving a pointed look towards a certain someone.And the results?NOT A DAMN THING.





	Aomine Daiki: Straightest Man Alive

**Author's Note:**

> A one shot! HAve fun and pls comment! 
> 
> ~idi2

 

It was another colorful basketball gathering at the outdoor basketball courts Kagami lived just down the street from. It was mid-morning on a Saturday. Kagami didn’t have to be at the station until nine at night so that he could be on duty for when people set their drapes on fire making three in the morning ramen. 

 

He sat on the old metal bench to the side of the court, right in front of an older metal fence, as he waited for everyone else to show up. So far, they had six out of eight. 

 

Kagami was practically a regular member of this highly kaleidoscopic group and, (un)fortunately, fit right in with the scheme. 

 

There was him, being grumpy and hunched over on the bench, the morning sun already beating down on his red hair and bare shoulders that the black tank top didn’t protect. He was being impatient for reasons that would be elaborated on after the scene was set up. Setting and all that. 

 

Then there was one, Kise Ryouta, a blonde guy who kinda reminded Kagami of a dog. With what minimum experience he had when it came to dogs that is. He also tried to keep anything involving Kise at the minimum too. It never worked out as well as he hoped, but that was okay. But that annoying truth aside, Kise was currently leaning on the fence, chatting with another member of the group who was  _ really good  _ at sleeping with his eyes open. 

 

That little cotton-candy haired dude was Kuroko Tetsuya. He’d invited to Kagami to these  _ weirdly  _ exclusive basketball meetups after they’d met at Kuroko’s school. Kagami and some co-workers had done their yearly visit where they geared up and showed the tiny people just how  _ cool  _ firemen where. And they were  _ very cool _ . He was his best case of evidence for that fact if he did say so himself. 

 

Kuroko didn’t really talk, more listened, making him the  _ perfect  _ one to get thrown under the bus whenever no one else wanted to deal with Kise. Not that the tiny blunette seemed all that bothered by that.  

 

The next notable member was the guy with a bag of chips parked at the opening to the court. It would seem Murasakibara hadn’t seen the point in using energy to walk  _ into  _ the court after getting to the door. Instead, he used his boy functions for something infinitely more useful, opening that current bag of chips. Or was that the current bag of chips? He could’ve inhaled three without Kagami noticing. He sure had the room for it, what with being a behemoth. What food didn’t go to his abnormally long legs, or torso, or wingspan, probably when to that purple mane of hair in Kagami’s personal opinion.

 

Followed by a green haired guy wearing leg warmers even though it would probably reach a high of 85 o  that day. That was Midorima, he was a prick but y’know not  _ that  _ much of a prick. Also. Green leg warmers did  _ not  _ match his orange basketball shorts. In the  _ slightest.  _

 

Ah, and he’d saved the best member for last. Kagami had been a little afraid that this hue coordinated group wouldn’t let him play with them seeing as how they already had a redhead. Luckily enough, he got to stay. Alongside a small psycho who he shared a hair gene with. Akashi Seijuro. It had never been explicitly explained to him, but Akashi was rich, possibly owned the basketball court he was sitting in and most  _ certainly  _ had his eye on world domination. 

 

That was where they stood. Six outta eight. Waiting on two more people. 

 

And when there was some high pitched scolding heard the distance, Kagami knew the wait wouldn’t be a long one. 

 

Not two minutes later, there was a small, well-endowed pinkette rushing onto the concrete court and its chain link fencing. And there was someone following slowly behind. 

 

The pinkette was Momoi Satsuki, take that as you will. Sweet, cheery, terrifying, and possibly telepathic. Or even something beyond that. Because she knew things about Kagami even  _ he  _ didn’t know. She was also more or less a saint for putting up with the person who strolled in behind her. 

 

Ahhh, now  _ there  _ was a someone.

 

Aomine Daiki. 

 

He was tall, tanned, with blue hair, midnight eyes, a  _ glorious  _ body and smirk that gave Kagami shivers. He was also an asshole. But that could be endured for long enough as long as Kagami got to stare at the biceps currently on display from Aomine’s loose,  _ loose _ white tank top. 

 

Oh, and there was one more thing Kagami hadn’t mentioned yet. 

 

He wanted to fuck Aomine. Or the other way around. Or something along those lines that involved Aomine’s lines because the man’s jawline was steel and his abs made it look like butter by comparison. 

 

Kagami suppressed a groan. And he suppressed looking too excited at the fact that Aomine wasn’t  _ half a day late  _ for once. 

 

He’d been that late the first time Kuroko had invited Kagami to one of these prismatic meet n’ greets + B-ball.

 

Aomine had strolled in while Kagami was  _ just  _ about to fake out Kise and go for an  _ awesome  _ dunk that would've tied the current game. 

 

Instead, he  _ dropped  _ the ball and tried to pick his jaw up off the floor because not only had the star of his deepest, darkest, wettest dreams walked onto the court but the guy also played  _ basketball.  _

 

Or, more accurately even if it made Kagami want to crawl up a wall to admit it. 

He  _ ruled  _ basketball. 

 

And so, it was obvious that Kagami wouldn’t have had much of a chance. And he hadn’t. It had been, what, a little over four months that he’d been playing with these guys? And he was crushing  _ hard.  _ There was no way he  _ wasn’t  _ going to fall hard for the idiot. 

 

Oh yeah! Aomine was an idiot. He gave Kagami himself a run for his money.

 

Example A being the very first words out of his mouth after walking in on the court. 

 

“Satsuki! We’re here, gimmie back my Mai-chan,” Aomine grumbled, hands in the pockets of his gray basketball shorts and his gym bag falling off his shoulder slowly. That _chocolate skinned_ _sculpted shoulder._

 

Ye _ p _ . Kagami was straight up doomed to follow around this beautiful man. The only thing that made it more pathetic was the fact that he accepted that knowledge wholeheartedly. 

 

“Dai-chan! No! I’ll give them back when we leave,” Momoi said, turning around to wave her finger in Aomine’s face. 

 

“Sorry we’re late Akashi-kun…!” Momoi said, turning to the small redhead. 

 

“Ah, it’s more than alright Momoi, so should we begin? We’ll do the first to ten for a warm up,” Akashi said, turning to the rest of the group. 

 

Kagami stood up off the bench, and because he was, of course, staring at Aomine, he noticed when the bluenette side eyed him. All Kagami could think was  _ good _ . Because there was another thing Kagami hadn’t gotten around to explaining. 

 

Now,  _ because  _ he wanted to do Aomine seven ways ‘till Sunday, he’d decided to try something with the quickly approaching heat. (btw Kagami was a little worried about Midorima if he was planning on wearing those leg warmers all day.)

 

Kagami was being a little prissy, he had to admit because over the past four months  _ Aomine  _ hadn’t seemed interested in anything besides napping and basketball. Oh, and being a dick to full chested women walking down the street. 

 

So, over the past couple basketball meetups, he’d put just a  _ little  _ more effort into getting ready. Like spiking his hair a little more, ditching any and all shirts he had involving sleeves and also wearing basketball shorts that didn’t fit in the conventional way. 

 

Now, was he currently in booty shorts? No. 

Was he drawing attention? Well, if someone wasn’t 100000% not into the XY chromosome, he better be. 

 

He knew he looked good in  _ this  _ specific black tank top with the two random white stripes on the right side and the red shorts that he hadn’t grown out of  _ yet.  _

 

So a side eye from Aomine was reassuring. The next step was for Kagami to get the hot moron to pin him to the fence.  _ Then  _ they’d be making some progress. 

 

“Ooh! Kagamicchi!” Kagami looked to the side to see a  _ wall of Kise  _ headed right for him. “Kagamicchi!!” The blonde called, grabbing his arm. “Be on my team! You, me, and Kurokocchi!” 

 

“Sure,” Kagami said with shrug. 

 

“I agree, Kise-kun,” Kuroko, who y’know, appeared outta fuckin’ nowhere said on Kagami’s other side with a basketball in hand. 

 

And Kagami only jumped  _ half  _ a foot in the air. Which was a new record low.

 

“We gonna play or what?” Aomine shouted from across the court. 

 

“Shut up, Aomine,” Midorima said, pushing up his glasses with a recently untaped hand. 

 

“Oi--!” 

 

“Be nice Dai-chan!”

 

And so, Kagami, Kuroko, and Kise (Hah, try saying  _ that  _ three times fast) walked across the court to start their game. 

 

↱↲↱↲

 

Kagami was sweating  _ so much.  _ He was honestly really happy for the shorts. They had some nice ventilation. He’d spent the warm-up match and the four matches after that chasing after Aomine. It was weird. Even with other people on each team, he and Aomine always drifted off into a one-on-one. Maybe it was just Kagami getting subconsciously drawn to the man’s ass. Who knew, honestly? 

 

The teams had changed up here and there, Midorima sat out in place of Murasakibara, Akashi ended up swapping with Kise, Kuroko did whatever the hell he wanted, trading teams every other game. Meanwhile, Aomine and Kagami stayed on opposing teams. And that was completely intentional. Facing off was more fun. 

 

And Kagami got more attention that way. Just like now. 

 

The current lineup had him, Akashi and Kise teaming up. Akashi was dribbling near midcourt, looking at his options with Murasakibara blocking. Meaning Kagami couldn’t see Akashi at  _ all.  _ Not a thing. It was like a damn magic trick. Meanwhile, Kise was trying to find a spot where Akashi could pass for him while also keeping an eye out for Kuroko. Who could be kinda  _ anywhere.  _

 

Then there was Kagami who couldn’t really do shit with Aomine at his back. Not that Kagami  _ minded _ , don’t get him wrong. If  _ only  _ it were under better circumstances. Circumstances that didn’t involve public areas. But there they were!

 

Kagami took a  _ small  _ step back, his back meeting Aomine chest. 

 

Aomine didn’t react. Not one even a huff of breath at the close contact to what was most certainly Kagami’s sweaty, smelly self. 

 

The bluenette only reacted when Akashi finally passed and the ball just  _ narrowly  _ made it into Kise’s hands.

 

↱↲↱↲

 

During the first (and what should’ve been almost the fourth because they were all morons who never admitted they needed water) water break, Kagami had grabbed Aomine’s water bottle out of the man’s hand. Aomine had gotten pissed in that lazy way of his. Glaring and swearing before slinking back to the shadows. 

 

He was mad about the loss of Gatorade, not the swapping of saliva. 

 

Huh.

 

↱↲↱↲

 

Kagami wasn’t one to assume things, but didn’t he look  _ alright  _ with his hair pushed back? 

 

↱↲↱↲

 

The ball had gone out of bounds after one of Kuroko’s passes went airy and Kagami had rushed for it  _ instantly _ . Aomine had started for the ball as well, which was perfect because Kagami got to exploit those red shorts of his while bending down to snatch the worn, orange ball. 

 

But when he turned around, Aomine was already halfway back to the rest of the group and quite  _ obviously  _ wasn’t in being entranced by Kagami’s ass like how he was supposed to be. 

 

Wha?

 

↱↲↱↲

 

It was now noon and it was  _ hot  _ and Kagami was the first to shed his shirt off, followed quickly by Kise. 

 

“Ahh, that feels better, doesn’t it Kagamicchi?” Kise smiled at him as he toweled at the back of his neck with the gray tee he’d worn moments ago. 

 

“Mm,” Kagami grunted. 

 

“We should get back to playing, Kagami-kun, Kise-kun,” Kuroko said, popping out of thin air, a water bottle in hand. 

 

Kagami chanced a look at the other players. Akashi was on the sidelines, talking Momoi. Midorima seemed to be in a pretty one-sided argument with Murasakibara. Probably attempting to get the huge lavender haired center to put the chocolate bar  _ down  _ while playing. 

 

Annnnnnd Aomine was legitimately staring off into space. Kagami almost felt insulted. Here he was, shirtless and panting with his hair swept back and… nothing. 

 

Was it possible Aomine was…

 

↱↲↱↲

 

Kagami was currently convincing himself that he had a pretty good track record when it came to the assumptions of people’s sexualities. Heck, as a kid he’d guessed that his aunt was gay. Although… he’d had a pretty big tip off seeing as how she never minded dropping him off for a coaching lesson with Alex… followed by some kissing and… okay, maybe it wasn’t a huge feat to guess that your aunt was gay when they were dating your coach but Kagami had never been so wrong that he’d  _ embarrassed  _ himself.

 

He’d gone to bars with mixed clientele and had never struck out. Kagami wasn’t so full of himself to think that he  _ turned  _ men gay so that obviously meant that he always  _ picked  _ gay ones, right? 

 

And even if he  _ did  _ turn men gay that didn’t explain what the fuck was going on with Aomine! 

 

This was getting to be… frustrating, to say the least. And confusing. Definitely that too. 

 

↱↲↱↲

 

Kagami didn’t understand it! He’d  _ tried  _ being subtle, but that was failing. So as he shook his head back and forth, water spraying everywhere from where he’d just dumped half his water bottle over his head, he shot a glance at Aomine and…

 

The bastard was sitting on a bench staring at the  _ ground!  _ There was a towel over the bluenette’s head as he stared at the  _ ground _ . Aomine found the  _ ground  _ more interesting. 

 

What kinda man found cracked concrete more interesting than Kagami when he was actually  _ trying  _ to get attention? 

 

There was only one he knew of. 

 

↱↲↱↲

 

If Kagami had learned anything from Legally Blonde it was that there was one  _ surefire  _ way to figure out a man’s sexuality.

 

But honestly, Kagami wasn’t sure if he had the right level of skill to pull off a decent  _ bend an’ snap.  _

 

↱↲↱↲

 

Kagami wanted to  _ throw  _ something. 

 

Kagami needed to get his gaydar checked because  _ god dammit,  _ he’d worn THE shorts. The BOOTY CALL shorts. The shorts he only wore when he was truly desperate for attention, the ones that only stopped at mid-thigh and hugged his ass like its life depended on it.

 

And the results? 

 

NOT A DAMN THING. 

 

Was Aomine simply the  _ straightest man alive?  _

 

Hell, he’d caught  _ Midorima  _ looking and in all honestly that was probably one of the most impossible things in the entire universe. 

 

Midorima looking at someone other than the nurse practitioner he worked with that sometimes invited himself along on the B-ball outings. That shouldn’t have even been  _ possible.  _

 

Kagami growled under his breath as he received a pass from Kuroko. 

 

↱↲↱↲

 

The meetup was rounding to a close. Everyone was packing up so that they could get home in time to grab a bite to eat. 

 

Kise had said a loud goodbye to everyone before running down the street, supposedly chasing Kuroko who’d slipped off without saying bye. Or he might’ve and no one noticed. 

 

Midorima had persevered through the leg warmers  _ all day  _ and Kagami was rather impressed as the tall greenette headed confidently down the street.

 

Murasakibara complained about the walking distance, but quickly cheered up and went on his way when Momoi reminded him of the candy store that was a few blocks over. 

 

As Akashi and Momoi went from talking about high workloads to… their favorite brands of cutlery? A conversation that seemed innocent on Momoi’s end and downright sinister when it came to Akashi, Kagami head over to where Aomine was  _ slowly  _ packing up. As if the effort it took to accomplish such an action wasn’t worth it to him. 

 

“Hey,” Kagami said, giving Aomine a quick nod when the bluenette lazily glanced at him. “You wanna grab a bite?” Kagami asked, absently fiddling with the bag strap on his shoulder. 

 

“Eh?” was all that Aomine drawled before turning back to his bag. 

 

“Food? You interested?” Kagami pressed. Maybe,  _ just  _ maybe, if he sat the man down at started him talking Aomine would mention a girlfriend or complete aversion to dicks that were not his own, thus putting Kagami’s mind at rest. 

 

Honestly without the  _ bend an’ snap  _ he wasn’t down to many options. 

 

“You know some place close by?” Aomine asked, slinging his bag over those broad shoulders. Aomine stared at him blankly, his blue eyes narrow and dull and his mouth naturally lying in a small frown. 

 

He still looked hot and it kinda made Kagami want to throw a brick at that stupidly hot face. 

 

Especially if this bastard was so selfish that he wouldn’t allow  _ half the population  _ a chance at him. Seriously, the humanity! 

 

“Well, there a burger joint not too far off,” Kagami said with a shrug. 

 

“They have teriyaki burgers?” 

 

“Umm… don’t think so? It’s a little family place so you’d have to ask--” 

 

“Nah.” 

 

“What?” 

 

“I said nah, I’m heading home.” 

 

“I’m sure there’s somewhere else? If you’re really that picky I could make something--?” And  _ yes _ Kagami was desperate enough to let this man into his home. He just wanted to  _ know  _ for the sake of his own pride. 

 

“Go back to your place?” Aomine asked and his eyebrows went  _ up  _ and the corners of his mouth  _ down.  _

 

“Uh, yeah. That a problem?” Kagami asked. He didn’t really like the face the tall bluenette was currently making. 

 

“I said I’m going home,” Aomine gruffed. He walked past Kagami, clipping shoulders with him. 

 

Kagami stood still for a moment, not even turning around. 

 

“ _ What?”  _

 

↱↲↱↲↱↲↱↲

 

Aomine put his key in his door with a shaking hand. He managed to open it and as soon as he heard the small  _ click  _ he  _ rushed  _ inside. Aomine was panting and he quickly  _ fell  _ back against his door. It closed with an overly loud bang and Aomine instantly slid down it as his butt hit the floor of his apartment’s entryway with a thump. 

 

The small hallway was dark and Aomine started out into the shadowed hallway before throwing his head back against the door with a loud groan.

 

“Fucking fuck!” Aomine growled. “You  _ perverted moron _ what the fuck is wrong with you?” 

 

His head felt like it wasn’t exactly attached to him. Not that that was one of his main concerns. No. Not even remotely because at the moment his  _ main  _ concern was: 

 

Kagami Taiga. 

 

Aomine wanted to moan at the bastard’s very  _ name.  _

 

His head was swimming with pictures of today’s game. Or mostly one specific player. 

 

Aomine had noticed on the very first day that Kagami was one  _ helluva  _ babe. The guy was tall as in almost as tall as  _ Aomine _ , he was ripped, his skin looked like honey and his eyes kinda haunted Aomine in all the good ways. 

 

All Aomine ever seemed to think about for the past few months was running his hands through that red hair. Alongside licking those damn abs and doing absolutely  _ everything  _ he could  _ think of  _ to that ass. 

 

And dear fucking lord. Today Kagami’s ass looked even better than usual. Aomine hadn’t even known that was possible but  _ there it was.  _ A pair of red shorts that left almost nothing to the imagination. But that didn’t mean Aomine’s imagination was on standby throughout the day. Aw, fuck no. It was going into overtime. 

 

His mind had made a montage of  _ all  _ the top  _ Hot Kagami  _ moments of the day, including  _ every time  _ the redhead bent over, him ripping his shirt off, pouring water over himself, just overall being his gorgeous self and--

 

Holy fuck today had been hard for Aomine. It had been  _ so hard  _ to not get caught staring. He’d glance up at Kagami doing something that would haunt his wet dreams for decades and he’d have to stare at the ground and think about old lady boobs and ASPCA commercials and that time someone released a bee into the classroom when he was in kindergarten just to will his boner away. 

 

Aomine had almost broken down into tears at the sheer level of restraint it took him to not just jump Kagami in a public area when the redhead swept his bangs back. 

 

“Hggggghnn,” Aomine whined into the emptiness of his apartment. 

 

It was honestly the  _ worst.  _ He was such a bad person. Kagami was just a nice guy who happened to be Aomine’s soulmate. It wasn’t the redhead’s fault that he was irresistible and caused Aomine so much grief. 

 

Kagami was perfectly innocent and most likely 100% unaware that he looked like such a sex god. 

 

And did Aomine feel guilty? Yea, a little. Would that stop tonight’s jerk off session with Kagami staring in his fantasies? 

 

Aw hell nawh. 

 

That’s what had made it so hard to refuse Kagami’s offer for food. He’d stood there in front of the redhead with the blankest face he could manage while his mind repeated stuff like  _ ‘Holy shit do you know you’re as cute as you are?’, ‘I’d love to grab food but if I don’t get home and masturbate to the thought of you  _ right now  _ I’ll probably die’, ‘Holy shit we can’t go back to your place. Do you know what restraint at this level feel like you sexy angel, you?’,  _ and  _ ‘OHMYGODYOUCANCOOKDOYOUWEARANAPRON?AREYOUINTOFUCKINGONCOUNTERTOPS?’  _ and lastly  _ ‘I am a sinner. What am I thinking all you want is a friend. I need to get Momoi to punch me in the face before I do something stupid like kiss you. Or suck you off. Or there’s always something to do with that godly ass you got there.’  _

 

So basically! Aomine was on the suffer bus. But as long as the suffer bus had lotion he’d be  _ fine.  _

 

↱↲↱↲↱↲↱↲

 

Kagami was actually  _ angry.  _

 

Just how homophobic was Aomine if he couldn’t even take up a guy’s offer on  _ dinner?  _ Just some food as  _ platonic friends.  _

 

Kagami was downright seething and probably not thinking straight as he punched into the chat he had with Kise on his phone that he wanted Aomine’s address. 

 

Kise responded instantly. With a winky face. 

 

↱↲↱↲↱↲↱↲

 

Aomine had been sulking at his door for what was rounding to be fifteen minutes. He’d slipped his shoes off but other than that just sat there sorting his thoughts. 

 

Those shorts did things to a man, after all. 

 

It was probably around minute sixteen that his door was suddenly possessed, started shaking and screaming at him. 

 

That or someone  _ really  _ wanted to see him. 

 

“AOMINE! OPEN THIS DOOR YOU FUCKER! IMMA GIVE YOU A PIECE A MY MIND YOU SHIT!” 

 

Now, it could be a great number of people angrily yelling at him and wanted to give him a piece of their mind. There was Wakamatsu from work, his old man neighbor across the hall, Satsuki, although the voice sounded a bit too low for that, Midorima was too busy avoiding him for a lecture and then there was always a chance it was an ex-boyfriend that had decided to go on a murder spree. 

 

Aomine groaned out his annoyance and slowly sat up. He lulled his head back to look at the shaking door. There might’ve been a talking rhinoceros on the other side too. That was always an option. 

 

Aomine stood up, leaving his bag and shoes scattered in the hall as he turned around to swing open the door. 

 

“Yo whachy--KAGAMI?” 

 

There in his doorway was one pissed off looking Kagami. And because Aomine was an idiot the only thing that registered in his brain was:  _ Fuck, we’d have amazing angry sex wouldn’t we?  _

 

“Aomine! You shit!” Kagami bellowed, his hands balled into fists at his sides and the surprisingly well-lit hallway to his apartment building showing that Kagami was still in the same sweaty clothes as he’d been in at the court. Meaning he was still in those  _ shorts.  _

 

“The one and only,” was all Aomine managed to say before Kagami was shouting again. 

 

“I want you to tell me somethin’, you get off on being an asshole? Or how about does it make you sleep easier at night knowing that your lack of humanity makes a tiny dent in the world? I mean--you wouldn’t even have dinner with me! Is the idea of going out with a guy  _ that bad?  _ Are you afraid of dicks? Is that a thing? And also, when I’m coming on to you why not  _ use  _ the balls you may or may not have to just  _ tell me  _ you’re not interested!?!” 

 

Aomine stared blankly at the sexy redhead fuming in his doorway. He just needed a moment to process the words he’d just heard. 

 

Obviously, he didn’t process it long enough because the first thing out of his mouth was, 

 

“I’m not afraid of dicks you asshole! AND I HAVE BALLS!!” 

 

“Then USE THEM!” Kagami snarled. 

 

“Why?? You want them against your ass, dickwad?!?” 

 

“YES!” Kagami banged his fist on the door jam in frustration. Obviously not registering what he’d just said. 

 

“Wait, what?” Aomine said. “ _ What?”  _

 

Suddenly the gears in Kagami’s head started turning and the redhead started blushing. Color spread across his entire face but he continued to frown. 

 

“L-listen you prick,” Kagami stammered. “I--You know what! I don’t even give a shit anymore! Yeah I want you up my ass! I want it hard, I want it now but that’ll never happen you straight fuck!” 

 

Aomine didn’t know what to think. Or how to feel. He wanted to be happy but he’d also gotten insulted? 

 

“Well that’s too bad, I’ve wanted to fuck you for months but if you’re gonna pull this confusing ass shit I don’t want anything to do with it! Now get outta my building if all you’re planning to do is yell at me!!” Aomine shouted. 

 

Kagami sneered at him and opened his mouth, “As if I haven’t wanted you longer! You know how long I’ve wanted your tongue down my throat?” 

 

“I’ve almost gone blind I’ve jerked off so much after meeting you!” 

 

“Yeah, well, I almost broke a vibrator last month!” 

 

“All I can think about is ripping those red short off and  _ finally  _ seeing that ass of yours!” Aomine had his doorknob in a death grip. 

 

“I wore these shorts to drive you crazy! And you didn’t look at me  _ twice! _ ” 

 

“Are you  _ fucking kidding me??  _ I was gawking every time you turned away! I almost gave Tetsu half my last paycheck to get him to take pictures!” 

 

“So lemme get this straight,” Kagami said, his voice a  _ little  _ quieter but not  _ really.  _ “We  _ both  _ want sex?” 

 

“Fuck. Yes. We. Do.” Aomine said, nodding assuredly. “Also, like, I’m so damn happy you wore those shorts for me.” 

 

Kagami smiled at him, his eyes crinkled and his teeth shined. 

 

“I’ll take them off for you too.” 

 

“Get in here!” Aomine almost moaned as he snatched a handful of Kagami’s tee shirt. 

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> *insert many gay things between two hella gay men here* 
> 
> MWAHAHAHAHHAHA sorryyyy but you saw the rating~
> 
> Thank you for reading and please comment and tell me what you thought! It makes me happy to talk to people~
> 
> ~idi2


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